Mixing: It's a bad idea
Recentley I experienced a lapse of judgement and mixed a night of alcohol consumption with pain medication (Robaxacet) and then allergy medication (no-name brand).
Now I really don’t regret what happened during this night because, lets be honest, it was a great night; yet lots of stuff was done that just was not me.
The memories I have are flavoured with a slight bit of nostalgia and yet seems so diassociated with my true self. They almost feel fake.
Now, my friends and I have a dynamic which perpetuates “zinging” or mocking one another, so when this happened to me inregards to that particular night I somehow felt the overwhelming urge to defend my actions. That feeling was quickly dismissed when I came to a new realization that my memories were not in myself, not first person. It woudl be more akin to watching yourself or someone on tv. My defensive stance was based entirely on my affection for a character that I had emotional investment; that character was myself.
So what I realized that, all I could do, and can only do now is go.. “Yup.. I did that” and move on.
Really what happend didn’t really phase me in the end, so why should I be hung up on it? Well the answer is I am not, which is perplexing because I had to rationalize that those memories are my own, and logically did all those things. So should I feel something for what happened? Embarrasment? Regret? or Esatic at my experience?
Pretty much I am estatic.
Thankfully what happened wasn’t really at all a big deal, but more so was the fact that I got to that state. Kinda weird to be out of body.
Now I am faced with something new. How does one get back into their body? The only way I know how is to write. So that is what I am attempting to do.
Let this be a lesson to you kids.. No mixing
